I'm Disappointed in Maurice Cheeks

You know... Call me unfair, but when I hear a man is named Maurice "Mo" Cheeks, I expect him to have some cheeks on him. So when I see this picture:

I get a little mad. Mr. Cheeks, you have no right to look so upset. I'm the person seeing a guy with a misleading name. I mean, SERIOUSLY, that's your name? That's the kind of name I would make up when ordering a pizza (And only a pizza). I mean, can't you work on your image a little?

I guess that's a little better. Your cheeks do kind of look a little big, but I dunno. I'm just not feeling it. Show me some TRAIL BLAZING CHEEKS! Some cheeks that I've never seen before! Some cheeks that light up the sky in all their cheeky glory!

YOU'RE NOT EVEN TRYING NOW! No wonder you got fired... all those time. But man, you sure can grow a bitchin' moustache. Oh wait... I just realized. Maybe I'm thinking of the wrong cheeks.

Ohhhh shiiiiiiit!